that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
