just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Randomize
