Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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