I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize