somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
