alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
what the fuck happened to the tacos
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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