It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
