i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
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