I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
