During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
