He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
