I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize