I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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