Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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