He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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