At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
