butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
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