Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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