I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
