i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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