from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
