I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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