Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
It's just like the Real World with babies
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
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