I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize