why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize