hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
You made out with two different species that night
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
