Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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