bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
