Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
