Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
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