AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
