He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
