piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
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