There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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