As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
