just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
