After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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