She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
