Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
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