Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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