Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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