So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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