Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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