I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize