i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
