i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Randomize
