my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
