I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
