Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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