I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
