Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
