Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
